A chocolate wrapper economy

‘If conning is an art then Dubai is a master piece.’

To put it simply, Dubai is nothing but a popular evening tabloid, which needs an exclusive story on the front page to sell itself, everyday. And Dubai’s growth is nothing but a staged show of numerous such stories.

So you hear that Dubai has the tallest building structure, to the biggest airport and port, to the biggest artificially created islands and to largest hotels, hospitals and stadiums. There are only 3 rules, it needs to be new, it needs to be the biggest and it needs to be now. It’s as if the story of growth is itself the fuel for it.

I am not a student of economics and far from being a social or business analyst. And most of my understanding is tainted by the fact that I am an Indian, born and brought up in India where ‘growth’, not long ago, was measured in chains of 5 year plans and for most of it, it still is.

However, I do understand that, irrespective of anything else, there is something called as a sustainable growth and every economy no matter how advantageous its position might be needs to evolve over a period of time with organic growth being at its core, in order to be sustainable.

But then ‘an economy’ refers to the commercial affairs of a country, or a collection of countries or states which unite under a central entity. Not sure if the traditional definition of an economy also includes that of a monarch ruled government with a flexible capitalist backbone. For those who don’t know, Dubai is not a country, but it can vaguely be defined as a state ruled by a king, and the most popular one of the 7 emirates (states) that forms UAE.

It’s tax free heaven, where one can easily bring in and covert all the black money one has accumulated by doing all the sinful things imaginable in this world, right from arms deal for terrorism to body smuggling, into white money and what’s more, have a potential to earn more money from it. In turn, Dubai also gives them refuge and a lifestyle to live their dreams without guilt or question. So even if on one hand I was amazed by the scale and speed of its growth, ( of money) I couldn’t appreciate it as it’s far easier when you aren’t answerable and you make your own rules.

As life might have it, I have lived in Dubai for the last 2 and half years and might even go back. During my stay there I observed from the small window of my understanding that the last 2-3 years has been very significant Dubai as it accelerated its growth story during this period, a story which is less than a decade old.

With no oil to sell any more, the 3 phased plan was to (i) set a stage for world class tourism attracting people from all around the globe and (ii) subsequently opening grounds for people to invest in real estate and offering them insane returns on investment and (iii) making sure that the initial investors reap in enough to attract others. This backed by no moral, ethical or ecological accountability was enough to make it work. And not very surprising, it did work.

Another critical component was the hype around Dubai which was created since the beginning of this plan and has been sustained till date. From hiring the biggest names and endorsing itself through global personalities in all fields, maintaining constant presence in news in the right places, seen with the right brands, companies, and countries, Dubai has done it all, and is a winning case-study in marketing and PR. It’s a living example of what money can achieve and how well can you spend it to earn more.

a fall is not a fall,

wish I could cry and tell a lie
believe in it until I die,
stare hard at something
and disappear in the slit
and let reality chase my wits
for I know an escape is not an escape
and a fall is not a fall,
because the rabbit hole is always
deeper than you thought
as there is always another world
beyond the wall you fallen on
so you become a stranger disguised
and you crawl... for an escape is never an escape
and a fall never a fall...

In search of words

Life is what happens to you when you are busy making other plans.

I didn’t know until yesterday that it was John Lennon who wrote that. Yesterday, I found it on a book cover and the same day on a website, and today it was mentioned in a movie. It can’t be more true and ironic (not because a “legendary-hippie” wrote that). Life is what happens to you when you are busy making other plans. You can’t blame it and you can’t completely accept it. Part of it happens with no resemble to the other part which you are so desperately trying to give a shape. Your decisions are half your chances and labored indifference gets you through almost everything.

Now as if that wasn’t enough, most of us (at least I am sure of me), don’t know what we want to do with our lives. And lately I have been so bad that I can’t even pretend to imagine what I really want to do. It’s painful. It’s painful not because I don’t know what to do, but more because I ain’t anywhere near to begin my search for what is it that I want to do. What is it that will set me free for once and forever.

I think, as a kid I was more of a person than I am right now. Well, actually that’s true for all us. But when I started out understanding this world, through books, people, music and movies, and a little of traveling, the more I knew the more I understood that though all this is essential, nothing is as important as having a clear mind and a serene peace which is untouched by absolutely anything around. But I also realized that I will be denied these two things. I knew in my deepest fear that I would have to lose both of them in order to wander and cope up with the world around. Today I am so lost that most of the times I even forget the purpose with which I started out this journey to nowhere from nowhere.

I know you will find it weird and me crazy. But today when I saw this movie, Frankenstein, which is a classic fiction about this scientist who in order to defy nature and push the boundaries of science puts life back into a dead body and manufactures a creature, who because he is denied of emotions and love turns into a monster killing innocent people to get back to his creator. I felt like I am that monster which I, myself created long back. The only difference was that it was less because of curiosity and more because of fear and to get away.

Honestly, today I don’t like myself. Which was fine, I have hated myself before too. But back then I use to smile about it as I was sure of the flight of my imagination and the innocence of my thoughts which always elevated me. Now I can barely walk trying to imagine something beautiful. My thoughts have become pieces of a puzzle that a lazy kid never wants to put together and so the picture is always incomplete.

Guess I have succeeded. I have lost myself and everything that I believed in. Actually I have gone way ahead of that. There is no hope in me but a faint breeze from the past.

I don’t know what lies ahead. Will I go down deeper this way or maybe I will stumble on something and the world around me will change. No I am not hoping for a miracle or waiting for things to happen. I am looking for something as small as;

‘A cold night

And it’s raining outside.

I am standing at the window

With a cup of coffee,

And beautiful thought in my mind, which will keep me warm and up all night.’

Do you really think that’s too much to ask for?

kyun khoye khoye...

Swanand Kirkire... undoubtedly the most fascinating and interesting artist around to emerge recently. Once again he has managed to sweep me off the floor (after Bawara Mann) with the title song that he has penned and sung for Sudhir Mishra's 'Khoya Khoya Chaand'.

Where was he all this while...?!!!

...kyon apne aap se khafa khafa
zara zara sa naraaz hai yeh dil
yeh manzile bhi khud hi tey kare
yeh faasle bhi khud hi tey kare
kyon to raaston mein phir seham seham
sambhal sambhal ke chalta hai yeh dil
kyon khoye khoye chand ki firaak mein
talaash mein udaas hai dil...


his poetries are about life... passion for life... and there is always this fleeting presence of a self within which is yet untouched by everything around... in the above extract of the song... there are so many contradictions... and then there is the obvious... the heart chooses its own ways and then decides its own distances... and even then it walks cautiously on these roads which it chose... (how true!!!)

I can keep writing about the song. Instead just listen to it a few thousand times...

zindagi sawaalon ke jawaab dhundne chali
jawaab (a half laugh pause) mein sawaalon ki ek lambi si ladi mili
sawaal hi sawaal hai soojhti nahi gali
ki aaj haath thaam lo ek haath ki kami khali
jee mein aata hai murda sitaare noch lun
idhar bhi noch lun udhar bhi noch lun
ek do ka zikar kya main saare noch lun
main saare noch lun
kyon tu aaj itna vehashi hai
mizaaj mein majaaz hai aye gham-e-dil...

Losing faith & gaining a belief

Given my past, my up-bringing and the way I have lived so far, I wouldn’t say that I have indulged in any kind of faith or harbored an enduring fidelity towards God or for that matter even a person or a thing. I believe in God through my mother, or rather more honestly and as I have come to see, her need to believe in Him.

So there was always this unspoken understanding with God that even though I don’t understand him and completely believe in him I will come to him if I need him. I will never blame him for not answering my prayers, as long I get to make them. It was as if the process was more important than the end result. Because I knew that if there exists a God, I would have to truly believe in him and that there was no way I could fake it. So the only way was to be honest about my doubts and so be sure as to what I expect from him. So he became the rock I could write on and the one which holds me steady.

Now I have learned that faith comes with learning and partly understanding what you can’t learn. But then if you hold steady, you might learn a little more of that too and thus proceed further on the journey towards your own understanding of faith. However, learning solely cannot and will not complete the understanding of Faith.

Because the very nature of Faith is incomplete, it needs that vacuum, where your beliefs are questioned and your doubts are put to test. It’s the union of your ‘understanding of reason’ and ‘the fealty of your will to overcome what you cannot understand’. So if you don’t acknowledge the importance of reason, your faith is one legged and if you believe that only reason alone will bring you to Faith, your Faith is colour-blind.

But to be honest, I am not looking for Faith, not as yet or anytime soon. I just need a belief that brings me one step closer to my Faith and still keeps me one step away. That way I get to question everything and still believe in miracles.

The problem with pain is that it doesn’t belong, and with happiness is that it never lasts long.

Here, I am back with my blog, back to scribbling random thoughts with consistent irregularity. There are two reasons I am blogging again. First, a close friend’s pursuance and second is KANK… urfff… Khabhi alvida na kehna.

YES!!!!

“What do you think about KANK?” It’s amazing how many girls/women have asked me this question ever since the movie released. To the extent that I kept my allergy of Karan Johar films aside and actually went out to get a DVD and watched it at home to see what exactly people are talking about.

And though it’s tempting for me to let out what I think about the movie and SRK’s performance (wonder why he was slapped only twice in the movie) I will do both of us a favour and stick to the subject about which this movie was and all the talk around it.

A pretty girl once told me that we complicate things a lot and I disagreed with her saying that life is complicated. But I think she was right, thou I wasn’t completely wrong. Life is complicated but we complicate it further. Well keeping aside the songs and SRK’s “over-towering performance” KANK is all about, “On what basis should one decide to marry someone and also be sure that he/she will love only the other person all his/her life and be loved in return?” Atleast I think that’s what the director wanted to say and he ended up making yet another Hindi movie.

However, before I get into my fundas and (long lost) ideals, I would like to confess that at this point in life I am in no position to talk about love/relationships, far marriage. But then the whole idea of writing a blog is that you get to talk about things you are in no position to speak about. And in this case, I am not even remotely close. But then what the heck…?!!

A serious relationship, Marriage, in absolute terms is nothing but a commitment. Well, not for all of us, in fact for most of us it is… or will be… an agreement that has to be done at a certain age and time. Many even give it the name of love but then this ain’t about the latter ones.

Ideally speaking (now that’s the word, “Ideally”), commitment shouldn’t be for a marriage but for the person you are getting married to. One has to be conscious about why is he committing to someone. What in that person makes him surer about himself. So he is not committing to something that is outside him and is imposed but to his understanding of what he wants. Few may argue that, that kinda commitment would be momentary. Well, it might be, but then as long as it is true, you are in an honest relationship. (If anyone really cares about it)

But then love is the name they have got for the in-adequacies of human heart and marriage is only a residue.